tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23152004383000174672024-03-12T17:50:15.086-07:00Life NotesI was talking to a friend of mine and the term "life notes" was put out there. When I heard it, it was like the Lord was speaking to me. So to him, I say thank you.MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.comBlogger36125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-48658464341842806752020-08-11T17:34:00.003-07:002020-08-11T17:34:52.181-07:00The Other Side of Rejection - Preface (Bible Study Lesson)<p> <span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.22px;">It took me a minute to finally get a chance to study trying to balance everything and everybody.</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">When I started, God started talking immediately </span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>I was only released to get into the Preface. I haven’t even been able to get through to even see the rest of the book)</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>This is gonna be heavy</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Take a few minutes (only to yourself)</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“This about what was the most damaging/traumatic thing that’s happened in your life?”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>What was the thing that caused a shift in who you are today? Or who you wanted to be today? What hurt you so bad that it made you give up on who you are at one point in time?</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>That’s where God is gonna hit with this</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">This isn’t about looking at the people on the screen or looking at the people next to you</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>God wants you to look specifically at you</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>As a matter of fact, look in a mirror or the camera in your phone at yourself</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Once you get a good look at yourself, say this out loud to yourself:</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“My soul is damaged, but its time to be whole”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Necessary to say it out loud, so you can hear it in your spirit and in the depths of your soul</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">“God wants to heal you everywhere you hurt”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>We know the song by Earnest Pugh</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>But we sing the song and we think about the surface stuff</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“My knee hurts”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“My bank account hurts”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“My kids/spouse/family member/boss is getting on my nerves”</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">While those things are important, those aren’t the “everywhere”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>The “everywhere” is also those deep rooted issues that you carry with you everyday</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>The “everywhere” is the extra emotional weight that’s being carried that’s being masked by physical weight</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>The “everywhere” is the areas of you that you may not even realize they’re there</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"> </span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">God took me back to my blog that I used to write</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Writing about feeling like I was in a prison cell</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>No walls, but a small window with a little piece of sunlight</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Sunlight was visible, but too far away for me to feel </span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">That’s what the bruising/damaged part of your soul is fighting</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>It sees the possibilities, but it can’t feel the rays of that freedom just yet</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">(Ive been instructed to start writing and blogging again. That was something that I gave up a long time ago. But it was so freeing to me)</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Definition of rejection - </span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>1 - the act or process of rejecting</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>2 - the state of being rejected</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>3 - <span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>something that is rejected</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Definition of reject - </span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>1 - to refuse to have, take, recognize, etc.</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>2 - to refuse to grant</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>3 - to refuse to accept</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>4 - to discard as useless or unsatisfactory</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>5 - to cast out or eject; vomit</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>6 - to cast out or off</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>7 - (medical) to have an immunological reaction against</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">We’ve all experienced one of these feelings at one time or another</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Church is good about it</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“Rejection is God’s redirection”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“One closed door means that one wasn’t for you. There’s another one coming”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“Just wait and watch God fix it”</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Those things make it easier to deal with, (sometimes), but they don’t deal with the feelings that come with the rejection</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Rejection can be damaging to the mind, the will, the emotions, the appetite, the heart, the personality and the belief system of humans. </span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Untended to rejection can cause permanent damage to the soul</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Monica has bruised lungs because of Covid - It’ll take at least a year to heal</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Something that she contracted that caused harm to her caused her to have damage to an internal part of her. That damage alters her life until her healing takes place.</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">We say that we are 3 parts and we know that in our heads, but we often forget that the soul and the spirit are 2 separate things</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>We want our soul to act like our spirit and just “bounce back” and “keep moving”</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">We try to “put God on it” like its a salve and just leave it alone</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Healing and deliverance doesn’t always come that way</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Sometimes deliverance comes in with a therapist</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>If God can call and ordain a doctor for your physical health, why cant He assign and call one for your mental and emotional health</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">A therapist is qualified to dig through the layers of things that have been added over time to get the to very root of you</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>We cant get there on our own</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Often too afraid of digging that deep and getting that far in</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">We get too far and realize that we aren’t as “together” as we think we are</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">I was a psychology major at Spelman.</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Always interested in the mind and what causes a person to do what they do</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>At the time it was serial killers. “What clicked and made them go”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Concentration was in mental health</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">I felt like I couldn’t pursue it because it would have been contradictory to what I believe. I’m seeing now that it would have been the greatest asset to me</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">*did you know* the mind can’t distinguish the difference between intense physical pain and intense emotional pain?</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>The brain processes emotional pain like a physical hit</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">*second sidebar note*</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Sometimes an introverted personality isn’t a personality trait, sometimes its caused by a wound/rejection</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Wilt thou be made whole?</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>We know the verse, we know the question</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">John 5:6 (1-9)</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Bethesda means - House of pity or mercy</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Everything the man needed was there the entire time</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Jesus saw how long he was sitting there. He watched for who knows how long.</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">He asked the man if he wanted to be made whole, if he wanted to be healed</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Why are you still here? He’s asking</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Instead of the man taking the initiative by answering the question, he gave an excuse</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“I have no man to put me in”<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>That’s like someone offering to take you out to eat and instead of saying yes or no, you say “but I don’t have any money”</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Both answers sound the same</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Who asked you that part? Do you want to go was the question</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">God is asking you the same question </span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Wilt thou be made whole?</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“Do you want to get well?” Is what the Message Bible translates to</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Do you really want to be whole?</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Are you ready to put in the work?</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">God says that this book/time isn’t for the faint of heart</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Trying to just listen and say “amen” isn’t gonna cut it</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>You have to put in the work to be well and to be whole</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">While studying, I heard the voices of the people say “ But God Im too old”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>“I’ve been this way too long” “I don’t think I can go that far and that deep”</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">God is saying, “you’re never too old to be healed”</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Aunt Queenie </span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Do you really want to be that way???</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">That man sat at that water for 38 years</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>How old was he when he got there?</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Was he already grown?</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>(Most likely)</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Take a 20 year old man and add 38 years to that - potentially almost 60 years old he was when he was healed</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">He had to make a decision though</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">God said that Before you get into this book, you have to make a decision. You have to decide within yourself if you’re going to put in the work for this</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Are you ready?</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">Straight up:</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>It’s gonna hurt</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>It’s not gonna be easy</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>You may even cry</span></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Its gonna suck before it gets better</span></p><p class="p2" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 20.5px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;"></span><br /></p><p class="p1" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-size: 17.2px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span class="s1" style="font-size: 17.22px;">But I promise you, it’s worth it</span></p>MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-29076099420160429462017-07-19T21:46:00.001-07:002017-07-19T21:48:10.266-07:00Bible study notes from July 19, 2017<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">James 1:4 KJV</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">But let patience have her perfect work, that he may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing. </span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">We're worried about the wrong thing</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">We hear this scripture and immediately get happy of of the "perfect and entire, wanting nothing"</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - proclaim it and run and shout everywhere</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> -miss the beginning completely</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Patience is the process</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - not just what you go through, but how you go through</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - " Patience have her perfect WORK"</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - WORK is the key word</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">We have no patience </span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Major changes (jobs, relationships/marriage, etc.)</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - we know the outcome an should to the outcome</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - hate the process </span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> * impatient</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> * try to force things to happen</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Trying to castor oil ourselves into premature labor</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - (old school/old wives tale oral remedy to induce labor)</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Seek the face of God</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">He's always speaking loudly and consistently</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> -INSTRUCTION - direction, order, or decree</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - CONFIRMATION - verification, proof, testimony</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - AFFIRMATION - declaration, proclamation, assertion</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Instruction- let patience have her perfect work</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Confirmation- that he may be perfect </span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Affirmation- perfect and entire, wanting nothing</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">He'll give you the what, why, how, when, where </span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">We're getting tired and wearing ourselves thin simply because we aren't listening</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - trying to do it on our own</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> *got news Tuesday, and trying to make things work so hard that by Friday, I was burnt out, on the verge of tears exhausted</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Perfect and entire is strategic </span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"> - not haphazard or coincidence</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Live ON PURPOSE</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Move ON PURPOSE</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Speak ON PURPOSE</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">In doing so, you'll get your perfect end</span></p>MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-13655266052345195502017-05-29T16:56:00.000-07:002017-05-29T16:56:38.529-07:00Bible Study Notes from 5/17/17 - Class Is In Session<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
"Class Is In Session"</div>
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1 Corinthians 3:6-7 (5-9)(KJV)</div>
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We're moving into a dispensation of time where the people of God are in competition with one another</div>
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-Want to outpreach, outprophesy, outexpound, outteach</div>
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Prophesy everywhere</div>
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-Disguised as an opportunity to grow the church</div>
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*Divide and conquer</div>
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Everyone wants to be deep and powerful</div>
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Everyone wants to draw a crowd, but who's doing the work to keep them</div>
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Who's taking the time to lay the roots?</div>
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Who's working with their leaders to draw to God and the kingdom instead of themselves?</div>
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We're undercutting true leadership in our own efforts to be great</div>
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-God called ME</div>
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FB post</div>
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-Plucking up the seed before it gets any roots</div>
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-Offended when people don't receive us like it's OUR Word</div>
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-Take it personal when we're just the mouthpiece</div>
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Apollos: A Jew (Acts 18:24)</div>
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-meaning: "One who destroys/destroyer"</div>
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-Studies show he was a teacher</div>
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(Ended up being a part of the class and not the notes LOL)</div>
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2 different types of teacher (Office of teacher)</div>
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Instructor/Trainer</div>
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Instructor: Brings practical application to the lesson to help to understand</div>
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Trainer: First partaker of the programs they prescribe</div>
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"The Teaching Ministry: An Introduction to The Teaching Office and Gift" by Roderick L. Evans"</div>
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(Back to formal notes LOL)</div>
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Apollos made his life's work to teach the Words of Christ as the Messiah</div>
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-"Bold" speaker</div>
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-Didn't back down</div>
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*Probably too aggressive at first</div>
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Didn’t even know the extent of the work of the Messiah at first </div>
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-teachings of John the Baptist</div>
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Priscilla and Aquilla</div>
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-Took the time to teach him the rest of the work</div>
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The made sure he knew the extent of what he was teaching</div>
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-only so much that John the Baptist could teach/preach on</div>
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Full understand</div>
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-Accurate teaching</div>
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Acts 18:27-28 (KVJ and NIV)</div>
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He spoke so accurately and boldly, that it established his reputation was established</div>
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-people spoke on his behalf </div>
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He boldly "refuted" the very people he came from</div>
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-He didn't just proclaim Jesus, he showed them, in the Word, where the information was</div>
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-He studied to SHOW</div>
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Can't ask God to put you on a platform when you didn't do the work to build the foundation that the platform sits on</div>
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It's easy to preach and get someone excited</div>
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-Teach the people something</div>
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Difference between Paul and Apollos</div>
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-Paul was great in his own right</div>
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-without the work of Apollos, he wouldn't have been as effective</div>
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5 Fold ministry</div>
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-Teachers are the foundation</div>
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-typically the least desired office/call</div>
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"I planted, Apollos watered"</div>
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-Paul acknowledged that the conjoined efforts of their ministries made the impact</div>
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Seed planting gets them in the door</div>
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-the watering establishes the roots</div>
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In order to stet the stage properly, we have to study and know what we're saying</div>
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Hosea 10:12</div>
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Fallow ground isn't attitude and disposition</div>
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Fallow ground -> incorrect teaching</div>
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NIV calls it "Unplowed ground"</div>
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-Tradition</div>
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-Religion</div>
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AMP calls it "uncultivated ground"</div>
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Message says "till the ready earth"</div>
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When ground is tilled, it's literally flipped</div>
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-fresh soil on top</div>
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Fresh soil cultivates life and growth</div>
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The Word gives repetitive requests and admonitions to get into His Word</div>
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-Ask</div>
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-Seek</div>
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-Knock</div>
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-Search Me</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-Study to show</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-Feed My sheep</div>
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<br /></div>
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He wants us to understand the vitality of His Word</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-All of it</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-Exactly as it's written</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Word is a contractual agreement</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-Contract in court</div>
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<br /></div>
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Can't paraphrase to fit our case</div>
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-verbatim is the stipulated clause</div>
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<br /></div>
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Class action suits</div>
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<br /></div>
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Jury duty</div>
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-Take info at face value</div>
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-Don't try to reinterpret</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
His Word governs how He moves</div>
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<br /></div>
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Isaiah 55:11</div>
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<br /></div>
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When you don't study it and misquote it, you nullify it</div>
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<br /></div>
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The very scripture that gives warning to this is the very one that is so often misquoted</div>
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<br /></div>
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"Try the spirits by the spirit"</div>
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-Not what it says</div>
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<br /></div>
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1 John 4:1</div>
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"...try the spirits, whether they are of God"</div>
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-no version says it the other way</div>
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<br /></div>
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References scriptures to this</div>
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Jeremiah 29:8</div>
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Matthew 24:4-5</div>
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<br /></div>
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*Wisdom component*</div>
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<br /></div>
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Learned/studied</div>
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-Don't become dogmatic because you know</div>
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<br /></div>
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"With lovingkindness have I drawn thee" (Jeremiah 31:3)</div>
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<br /></div>
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Balance</div>
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-that’s what they brought to each other (Paul and Apollos)</div>
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<br /></div>
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Each role is imperative</div>
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-Can't plant and expect a dry seed to grow</div>
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-Can't water a seed that's not planted and expect it to grow</div>
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<br /></div>
<br />
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Kingdom building is a collaborative effort</div>
MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-32080432659438409112017-02-19T22:40:00.000-08:002017-02-19T22:40:08.146-08:00Bible study notes from February 16, 2017Bible study lesson - Temporary Insanity 2/16/17<br />
<br />
Glimpses of someone running through dark halls. Yelling for freedom, but unsure of where to go. Feeling around don walls and reaching for doorknobs that aren't there.<br />
<br />
"Right here" you hear a voice say. You look around like the voice is talking to you, but you realize the voice is talking to the one running through the halls. They stop and their head moves from side to side, trying to hear where the voice is coming from.<br />
<br />
"Right here" you hear again. But this time it's more distinct. You're able to distinguish the direction and you look toward the voice and see an open door in the distance. A bright light at the end of the dark hall. So you try to reach for the person that is now in a full out panic. But you can't seem to get to them.<br />
<br />
You start to yell for them to find the door. You're completely dumbfounded as to how something so simple is so oblivious.<br />
<br />
You watch this horror unfold before your eyes as you see the person that was so frantic, sitting against the wall full of tears. Sitting so close, but apparently so far.<br />
<br />
All the while, the voice keeps saying, "Right here" "right here". The light seems to get brighter as you get more frustrated at what you're seeing. The hurt, the frustration, and the try again. Each time, seeming to travel right on the edge of the light. Hunting through the darkness; completely oblivious to the freedom that is right before them.<br />
<br />
How in the world are they missing this? How can something so obvious be so hard to find? It frustrates you to watch such a debacle happen before your eyes. You try to figure out a way to help them, but it seems like there is a boundary line between you and them. You watch them to the point that it becomes pure anguish to see. Constantly pacing, panicking, missing the very thing that is right before their eyes.<br />
<br />
You clearly see the way. You hear the voice, but for some reason, there's missing it. They hear the voice, and they turn to where it sounds like it's coming from. Where it just might be, but they can't find it.<br />
<br />
"How do they get out?" you finally ask the Lord. His reply is simple...<br />
<br />
"They just have to open their eyes"<br />
<br />
Isaiah 29:13-21 (KJV, AMP)<br />
<br />
*It's easy to take this piece and equate it to pain and struggle.<br />
-Pain is familiar<br />
-hurt is the easy thing<br />
<br />
*Bur the wanderer that's frantic in this piece is your anointing and your call<br />
-Your spirit man<br />
-your gifting, your calling<br />
<br />
*Spent so much time looking at the wrong and the past, that we miss where we are now.<br />
<br />
*God has delivered out of the past things and kindled the fire fo our giftings, but we're right of the edge of that light trying to figure out why wer haven't moved to the next phase.<br />
<br />
*With all the Word and prophesy that's coming forth, we're running in the moment and telling God that we availing ourselves to Him.<br />
-But when we get home, our minds have already travelled to the next thing on our agenda (work, school, children, Sunday dinner, etc.)<br />
-By Wednesday, we don't even remember what was spoken on Sunday.<br />
<br />
*We don't want to study or pay<br />
-So focused on being "new", that we're misssing what the "new" consists of<br />
<br />
(End of verse 13)<br />
(Reverence for me is a tradition...)<br />
-Church<br />
-Praying<br />
-Preaching<br />
-Teaching<br />
-Evangelizing<br />
All on tradition, and we don't even understand the history behind the tradition that we're carrying on with<br />
<br />
*We're trying to feel our way through instead of taking the time to see<br />
<br />
*Frustrated with the ebbs and flows of ministry and our own anointing<br />
-This should be easy<br />
-This is what we do/what we've always done<br />
<br />
*Different dispensation of time<br />
-God is requiring more<br />
-Requiring a true heart sacrifice<br />
-"Will you be the sacrifice"<br />
<br />
*Focusing on the eyar of 2017 being one of prosperity and excess for the body of Christ<br />
-missing the objedience of the body too<br />
<br />
*We can't depend on what we knew things to be<br />
-Diffence between the Old and New Testament with this move<br />
-The end result is the same, but the process is way different<br />
<br />
Verse 14-16 (AMP)<br />
<br />
*No longer business as usual<br />
-We've become the founders/elders<br />
-We've become hte ones that lay the foundation<br />
<br />
*Remove the cocoon<br />
-Step out and spread wings<br />
<br />
*It's time to identify who we are in Him<br />
-Full sacrifice<br />
-"Ive call you and qualified you for what I've called you to"<br />
<br />
*Confused freedom with a place where we don't have to work<br />
-Myself in cluded<br />
-Relay Race - we're all 4 legs of our race<br />
<br />
*I've overcome! I've made it! I survived!<br />
-Now what?<br />
<br />
*Lord I wanna be great!<br />
-Sit on our hands with our mouth sealed shut<br />
-The anointing requires work<br />
<br />
*Example of spirit man behind wall<br />
(Saw a figure standing behind a wall with it's arms out. The image was glowing bright. But there were dark gashes that weren't radiating any light. The Word was floating out of air like bandages and covering the gashes. Gashes and dark spots were complete healed)<br />
-Dark gashes healed with the Word<br />
-But still behind the wall<br />
<br />
*Removing bricks<br />
-Takes force<br />
-Takes Determination<br />
-Can't tear down with hands<br />
-Requires machinery to ensure the strength required to do the job.<br />
<br />
*Your heart is the wrecking ball to that wall<br />
-The uniting of the heart with the mouth breaks the barrier<br />
<br />
*Hand sitting inbetween hands as you're trying to clap<br />
-Clapping is sign of praise and adulation<br />
-Hand between hands prevents a proper praise<br />
<br />
*Will you let your heart break the wallMuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-48971254839449335582017-02-19T22:36:00.003-08:002017-02-19T22:36:43.939-08:00Temporary InsanityGlimpses of someone running through dark halls. Yelling for freedom, but unsure of where to go. Feeling around don walls and reaching for doorknobs that aren't there.<br />
<br />
"Right here" you hear a voice say. You look around like the voice is talking to you, but you realize the voice is talking to the one running through the halls. They stop and their head moves from side to side, trying to hear where the voice is coming from.<br />
<br />
"Right here" you hear again. But this time it's more distinct. You're able to distinguish the direction and you look toward the voice and see an open door in the distance. A bright light at the end of the dark hall. So you try to reach for the person that is now in a full out panic. But you can't seem to get to them.<br />
<br />
You start to yell for them to find the door. You're completely dumbfounded as to how something so simple is so oblivious.<br />
<br />
You watch this horror unfold before your eyes as you see the person that was so frantic, sitting against the wall full of tears. Sitting so close, but apparently so far.<br />
<br />
All the while, the voice keeps saying, "Right here" "right here". The light seems to get brighter as you get more frustrated at what you're seeing. The hurt, the frustration, and the try again. Each time, seeming to travel right on the edge of the light. Hunting through the darkness; completely oblivious to the freedom that is right before them.<br />
<br />
How in the world are they missing this? How can something so obvious be so hard to find? It frustrates you to watch such a debacle happen before your eyes. You try to figure out a way to help them, but it seems like there is a boundary line between you and them. You watch them to the point that it becomes pure anguish to see. Constantly pacing, panicking, missing the very thing that is right before their eyes.<br />
<br />
You clearly see the way. You hear the voice, but for some reason, there's missing it. They hear the voice, and they turn to where it sounds like it's coming from. Where it just might be, but they can't find it.<br />
<br />
"How do they get out?" you finally ask the Lord. His reply is simple...<br />
<br />
"They just have to open their eyes"MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-35202250767421137432017-01-09T11:43:00.001-08:002017-01-09T11:43:16.096-08:00Hurricane Thoughts (October 2016)<div class="MsoNormal">
Fears of shame and inadequacy, plaguing the storm of the loud
mind and the quiet face. The end of the storm
waits quietly in the ocean of her insides, twisting and turning and raining at
will. Waiting on a moment to destroy anything in its path. But she holds it together, keeping the storm
together within the levees of her heart and mind. All it takes is one thing to poke or hole or
pull a sandbag and the floods will come spilling out. The weight won’t be so
heavy but it makes for certain destruction. No matter how soft or hard the water
comes, it’s treacherous.<o:p></o:p></div>
MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-60375025855945473072016-12-14T10:35:00.001-08:002016-12-14T10:35:50.799-08:00Morning<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Ever thinking, ever watching, trying to maintain peace and not offend. For years, I worked to stay out of the way and stay behind the scenes. "Maybe if I stay quiet, I can stay in the shadows". LIke a solider that comes home from war and battles PTSD. Locking myself inside my 'safe' place. Not realizing that the walls that I thought were protecting me were the very things suffocating me. Closing in, getting smaller, claustrophobic dreams and visions while standing out in the open.</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">Now that the walls have been pushed back...now my watch and think are of the things of tomorrow. The inward desires that are expressed outwardly as jokes are coming back. The true passions and desires of my heart and being released to me, and He's not just letting me know that they are being done, He's opening the veil and allowing me to watch. I feel like I'm standing in the holies waiting to walk into my next phase, but I'm being allowed a glimpse of the greatness to come. Like a child waiting for Christmas, I'm supposed to be asleep, but I can't help but peek behind my bedroom door to see the splendor that awaits me. But I get caught, and instead of being chastised for not being asleep, He pretends I'm not there, just long enough for me to watch. I still have to wait until the morning to open everything, but the excitement of being able to see everything all wrapped up and every single one has my name on it keeps me from being able to sleep.</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69); min-height: 22px;"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';"></span><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0px; line-height: normal; font-family: '.SF UI Text'; color: rgb(69, 69, 69);"><span style="font-family: '.SFUIText';">My sleepless nights are no longer because of fear, but of anticipation. My heart beat increases out of excitement, and no longer fear. I keep hearing "It's time! It's time!". I can see the sun starting to shine outside my bedroom window. Morning is on the way.</span></p>MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-22720500812408722352016-12-07T19:26:00.002-08:002016-12-07T19:26:46.251-08:00Random ThoughtsThere are 2 sides to me. The outside that everyone sees, and the inner part of me that's still trying to decide who and what she's ready to be. My soul is bruised to the core...the wounds have healed, but the remnants of the scars are trying to ache. All by holding onto the things inside. I've resorted to licking my own wounds.<br />
<br />
(My God!)MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-26925094488070715122016-12-07T19:10:00.000-08:002016-12-08T08:23:48.019-08:00Where Is Your Dirt (Bible Study Lesson)<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
I knew about this day for quite a while now, but it seemed like I couldn't figure out what I was going to teach about. So one evening, I was sitting at my boyfriend’s at the time and asked the boys what I should teach about. I walked over to the counter and saw a plaque that he earned. Now I've read this plaque I don't knowhow many times, but this time it read completely different. And on the plaque, the award is for being the "Man/Person In The Arena".<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizKReC5s-fxvJ0vkdtVvyzWtf8G8CZoxbIQ_-Yqcq9whzZFDAa2WUDxWnhgxqnLZwPxGZ1klIGmF-F369gw5B1S7mn_qj8ByqZu7W0HBWj4hwcPpapGdLZSP5vdNwWaiXMmvMe-6o_xN4/s1600/screen-shot-2015-08-04-at-12-11-19.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizKReC5s-fxvJ0vkdtVvyzWtf8G8CZoxbIQ_-Yqcq9whzZFDAa2WUDxWnhgxqnLZwPxGZ1klIGmF-F369gw5B1S7mn_qj8ByqZu7W0HBWj4hwcPpapGdLZSP5vdNwWaiXMmvMe-6o_xN4/s320/screen-shot-2015-08-04-at-12-11-19.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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So, my question to you today is "Where's Your Dirt?"</div>
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So when you think of something that's dirty, you think of something messed up and smelly. (Furniture, clothes, dishes, kids that smell out like "outside")</div>
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Not only are those things true, but things that are dirty are also things that are shown to be valuable, useful, a sign of potential success. </div>
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(example) A clean jersey in a championship game</div>
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Yeah, your team may have won and you got the ring, but did you earn it? Did you put forth the effort to get in the game?</div>
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What if I told you that we were created for the dirt. For its in the dirt that life begins and miracles happen</div>
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Adam and Eve - Came from dirt </div>
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Blind man - Spit in the dirt</div>
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Woman at the well - wrote in the dirt</div>
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People that garden are on their hands and knees in the dirt and in the mud, to create the beauty of their garden. They have to get their hands and their clothes dirty to bring forth the life that they're working to create. </div>
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<b>1 Corinthians 3:6-8</b></div>
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<b><i>6</i></b><i> I have planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase.</i></div>
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<b><i>7 </i></b><i>So then neither is he that planteth any thing, neither he that watereth; but God that giveth the increase.</i></div>
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<b><i>8 </i></b><i>Now he that planteth and he that watereth are one: and every man shall receive his own reward according to his own labour.</i></div>
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While the planting may be the lesser of the job, how can God water if there’s nothing to plant?</div>
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We want to be these dynamic people of God that draws the multitudes, but we only want to “rub shoulders with our kind”. We treat Christianity like it’s this exclusive club of socialites, and then we wonder why the church won’t grow. </div>
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We're a people that admire and pick fun at (guilty a charged) the people that peach on the corners or go to the bars to convert people, but then we wonder how some of the people that were converted out of those bars became that way. </div>
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Not saying that being out on the corner and in the bar and in prison is for everybody, I believe that there are people that have been given that calling. But it’s the Holy Boldness that they have that we all need to develop. </div>
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We’re in a society where the church is constantly scrutinized and made out to be weak (movies, tv shows) and hyper critical (radial “christians”) to the point where people are turning away from the church in droves. I know what the Word says about the last days and how people will be lovers of their own selves </div>
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<b>2 Timothy 3:1-7</b></div>
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<b><i>1</i></b><i> This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.</i></div>
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<b><i>2 </i></b><i>For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,</i></div>
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<b><i>3 </i></b><i>Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,</i></div>
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<b><i>4 </i></b><i>Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;</i></div>
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<b><i>5 </i></b><i>Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.</i></div>
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<b><i>6 </i></b><i>For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,</i></div>
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<b><i>7 </i></b><i>Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.</i></div>
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but instead of going out to combat the issue, we sit in our 4 walls and critique and talk about what a shame it is at the affairs of the world. </div>
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Instead of being a catalyst for change, we’ve become mere spectators. Bystander apathy is the Psychological term. When multiple people see what’s going on, but assume that someone else is going to make the 911 call, or don’t call because they don’t want to “get in the middle”. But isn’t that our charge?</div>
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<b>Matthew 10: 5-8</b></div>
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<b><i>5 </i></b><i>These twelve Jesus sent forth, and commanded them, saying, Go not into the way of the Gentiles, and into any city of the Samaritans enter ye not:</i></div>
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<b><i>6 </i></b><i>But go rather to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.</i></div>
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<b><i>7 </i></b><i>And as ye go, preach, saying, The kingdom of heaven is at hand.</i></div>
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<b><i>8 </i></b><i>Heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead, cast out devils: freely ye have received, freely give.</i></div>
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The sick, dead, and lost are the dirty. And in order to reach them, we have to get down to where they are. We can’t be so concerned about our own reputation, that we forgo our purpose. We want the “washed whiter than snow” to be now instead of how the Word promises it to be, which is in heaven.</div>
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(Overcome by the Blood of the lamb and by the Word of our testimony)</div>
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What do you think your testimony is?</div>
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You can't overcome if you can't endure/go through </div>
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(And when thou are converted, strengthen your brethren)</div>
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Our drawing power is our experience. The things we hide from, the things we try to ignore don't exist, the things that changed who we are. </div>
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But we want to lock it away into the trap doors and smoke mirrors of our heart, so we can clean up like the church elders with our pristine white suits. </div>
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MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-60195961054368664832016-12-07T19:06:00.001-08:002016-12-07T19:18:42.979-08:00Masterpiece (Bible Study Lesson)<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
I’m discovering the many different ways and things that the Lord uses to speak to you. But one thing is for certain is that when He does, it’s undeniable. </div>
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I had like 3 weeks to prepare for this and the whole time I’m like “ok Lord, feel free to drop somethin on me at any moment” “I’m right here, ears open”, thinking maybe if I drop the bible and see where it opens I’ll get somethin. LOL. I’m listening to other people’s messages intently, looking for the lightening to strike in the sky or the sun beam of epiphany on what to teach on came, but of course it didn’t work that way. </div>
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It wasn’t until this past Sunday that it hit me. And it was while I was out driving. Apostle Rankin preached a great Word and talked about a “Spiritual DUI (Spiritually Dying Under The Influence), and while I was able to relate to a lot of the issues and things that he talked about, at the same time I felt like “well, Lord, I thank You for delivering me and helping me to not have issues in those areas anymore”. I’ve grown and moved past some of those things and now I’m stronger because of it. I felt good about myself.</div>
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And I’m sure the Lord was like “awwww, my daughter is to precious and delusional. (like we look at our children try to do something that we know good and doggone well that they aren’t big enough to do yet) Let me show her where she really is”</div>
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So while riding back to my boyfriend's (at the time) house (I’m finding that he seems to be a common denominator in the last few of my lessons lol), I was having a little moment and realizing that I’m still not “all the way there” in some of those things that I thought I was good in. I ate real good and thought I was full, but I’m finding that I still have some “empty pockets left in my spiritual stomach, that can get some more food into”. And while I’m having my little pity party by myself (cause the kids were asleep) trying not to cry, I said to myself “you know, I just want to have a drink and go to sleep.” Knowing that the alcohol settles in and makes you sleep a little heavier. (transparent moment). </div>
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It was then that the Lord spoke (He speaks to me like I do Him. My inquisitive nature and always wondering how and why is exactly how He gut punches me back), and He said to me “Why are you trying to fix your broken pieces with Elmer’s glue? The same fire that it took to mold you is the same fire that it takes to fix/repair you.”</div>
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So like i said, I was having my pity party and I was immediately condemned. But in such a loving and “come on now” way. He didn’t ask me the question really harsh, but it sounded like a frustrated parent’s “why are you doing that” kinda way.</div>
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Isaiah 64:4-11 KJV/MSG</div>
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(KJV) <b>verse 5: “in all thy ways acknowledge Him”</b></div>
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(KVJ) <b> verse 6</b>: <b>Definition of Iniquity</b></div>
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<b>Message Version</b></div>
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<span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Isaiah+64%3A4-11&version=MSG"><b>https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Isaiah+64%3A4-11&version=MSG</b></a></span></div>
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(MSG) <b>verse 5:</b> Sin-infected - puss filled infection (Facebook post about infection in leg) - not just puss but odorous puss. </div>
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(MSG) <b>verse 8: “Still, God”</b></div>
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(MSG) <b>verse 10:</b> Jerusalem, Zion represent the lands of miracles and feasts, but when we don’t move in Him, those areas dry up and look like spiritual deserts</div>
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Now going back to the KJV, it used the word “Iniquities” a few times. </div>
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When I used to think of iniquity, I only thought of sin. But I said, alright Lord, if this is what you’re giving me, there has to be more.</div>
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But if you really take the time to think about the term “grossly unfair behavior”, isn’t apprehension unfair? Isn’t the “I got it, I’m good, I’ll work it out” thought process unfair? </div>
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So it’s not just in our major “big sin” actions that we are unfair to God. How are we going to allow the Word to manifest itself, if we don’t allow Him to do the work that’s in His word.</div>
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“small foxes that ruin the vine” </div>
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It’s easy to stop with the things that we consider big. But it’s those small inward things that we think “oh this won’t hurt anybody. I’ll just deal with this by myself” that make or break our next move in Him.</div>
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The Lord is saying: How dare you have the nerve to hold back, when I told you that you were free. (Ouch to my own self)</div>
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We’ve been put in a position to facilitate a catalytic shift, but our lands are dry and barren. We’re allowing our (my) own issues to get into the way of who and what we’re called to be.</div>
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Have you ever taken pottery or taken the time to see how a ball of clay turns into a finished product. And i find it ironic that He used the example of a ceramic vase to me. </div>
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(the clay is molded to it’s form and has to be glazed or coated and then put into the fire to be solidified and ready for use. Without the fire, the clay is not able to be used because it’s not sturdy enough to hold whatever it needs to hold, even after it’s dried. The form will just crumble when it dries. But when it’s put into the fire, the composition changes and solidifies to a completely new from or matter)</div>
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But the vase was shattered with the attempt to be repaired. But you could still see the holes of where the small pieces were still missing. But inside those holes, were beams of light. (The Lord uses a lot of visual elements of examples with me)</div>
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You can re-fire a single piece as much as 10 or more times (if done properly).</div>
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The vase is us with the broken pieces and areas of our lives. We have the opportunity to hold something so amazing and so beautiful, but because of our holes and cracks, our anointing is just seeping out at the sides. When a vase is cracked, we may throw it away, instead of throwing it a way, a potter knows how to correct it and has the tools to repair it properly. The potter knows just how much glaze and just how much fire and heat is needed to fix the item. Or if it needs to be broken down and shaped into something else. </div>
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“The Potter’s House” (Walter and Tramaine Hawkins)</div>
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<span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C14OuEGghhk">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C14OuEGghhk</a></span></div>
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The song says “Give Him the fragments of your broken life” (I always thought it said “He’ll heal the fragments of your broken life lol) <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>That thing just had some serious new meaning to me with this lesson. </div>
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Saying all of that to say, while we feel like we are well and capable to working through our own issues and situations, it’s not ours to fix. Loose and let go of the things that you’re holding on to. (closed mouths don’t eat and closed hands/hearts don’t get help)We are sooooo much more than what we’ve been through. But we are holding onto our issues and insecurities (myself too) like it’s who we are. When God is saying “that’s not who you are, it’s merely what you had to go through to get you to this point. Every tear and every thing you’ve experienced/witnessed was simply a brick to add to your foundation. It’s some more roots for your tree.”</div>
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Masterpiece</div>
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<b>Lyrics to song</b></div>
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<b>In case you have fallen by the wayside of life</b></div>
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<b>Dreams and visions shattered, You're all broken inside.</b></div>
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<b>You don't have to stay in the shape that you're in</b></div>
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<b>The potter wants to put you back together again,</b></div>
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<b>Oh, the potter wants to put you back together again.</b></div>
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<b>In case your situation has turned upside down,</b></div>
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<b>And all that you've accomplished, is now on the ground.</b></div>
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<b>You don't have to stay in the shape that you're in</b></div>
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<b>The potter wants to put you back together again,</b></div>
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<b>Oh, the potter wants to put you back together again.</b></div>
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<b>You who are broken, stop by the potter's house.</b></div>
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<b>You who need mending, stop by the potter's house</b></div>
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<b>Give Him the fragments of your broken life,</b></div>
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<b>My friend, the potter wants to put you back together again,</b></div>
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<b>Oh, the potter wants to put you back together again</b></div>
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<b>Joy in the potter's house.</b></div>
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<b>Peace in the </b><a href="x-apple-data-detectors://4"><span style="color: #e4af0a; direction: ltr; unicode-bidi: embed;"><b>potter's house</b></span></a><b>.</b></div>
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<span style="color: #454545;"><b>Love in the </b><a href="x-apple-data-detectors://5"><span style="color: #e4af0a; direction: ltr; unicode-bidi: embed;"><b>potter's house</b></span></a><b>.</b></span></div>
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<b>There is salvation in the </b><a href="x-apple-data-detectors://6"><span style="color: #e4af0a; direction: ltr; unicode-bidi: embed;"><b>potter's house</b></span></a><b>.</b></div>
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<b>There is healing in the </b><a href="x-apple-data-detectors://7"><span style="color: #e4af0a; direction: ltr; unicode-bidi: embed;"><b>potter's house</b></span></a><b>.</b></div>
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<b>There is deliverance in the potter's house.</b></div>
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<b>You'll find everything you need in the </b><a href="x-apple-data-detectors://8"><span style="color: #e4af0a; direction: ltr; unicode-bidi: embed;"><b>potter's house</b></span></a><b>.</b></div>
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<b>The potter wants to put you back together again,</b></div>
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<b>Oh, the potter wants to put you back together again.</b></div>
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MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-70216688910542976912016-12-07T19:04:00.000-08:002016-12-07T19:18:21.371-08:00Will You Trust Your History, Or Will Your Gut/God (Bible Study Lesson)<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Initially I was going a different route entirely</div>
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*Father of Lights -Netflix</div>
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*Darren Wilson</div>
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*Trilogy</div>
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That drive to work </div>
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*The Bible Experience</div>
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*Acts 27</div>
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*Evangelist Lee sermon </div>
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*Gainesville</div>
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-jokes about taking notes</div>
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-already in my notes</div>
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-tried to take notes, but hit delete right after he accident</div>
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Acts 27 and 28</div>
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*jumping around a little</div>
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While reading/listening the Lord gave me a few things and then a drive that there was something else to the story </div>
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*hidden treasures</div>
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*listened to and then read in 3 different versions</div>
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*real life, in my face examples</div>
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*speaking while I was working</div>
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-seemed everywhere until I wrote everything out</div>
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The man of God talked about the man who's daughter was sick unto death</div>
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*how everyone is blessed by what you've been praying for</div>
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*struck a nerve</div>
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*that night and the following day (in subsequent conversation) is when subject came </div>
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We all know history repeats itself</div>
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*fashion trends</div>
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*music</div>
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*racism/sexism/etc.</div>
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*new generation bringing back "old ways"</div>
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Because we rehearse history so much, we set an expectation and precept for everything in our life </div>
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*compartmentalize in a cute box</div>
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*cookie cutter syndrome</div>
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*Stepford Wives</div>
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It causes us to put limitations on our own capabilities and everything according to God</div>
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*He's only able to do according to the extent that I can fathom based on experience</div>
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*radical prophets/evangelists/saints </div>
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-Doug Addison-prophet-tattoos</div>
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-Todd White-evangelist-healing on the spot </div>
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These guys test the boundaries of "Christianity" and faith</div>
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We're taught that we can't go into certain areas to profess the Lord because it's "out of place" or a taboo area </div>
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*all because of history and what is told is acceptable </div>
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Jesus wasn't "acceptable" and challenged His disciples and everyone after Him to do the same</div>
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*challenging us</div>
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*youth of today for Christ-boldness</div>
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Even taking it back to the book of Acts</div>
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*Paul told them it would be great loss</div>
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-history with ships</div>
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*captain of the ship was the initial faith holder</div>
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-they'll be fine</div>
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-Centurion</div>
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Destinations of the ship</div>
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*trying to find some kind of land</div>
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*worse storm got, worse people got</div>
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The Lord was telling us the outcome the entire time</div>
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Verse 16: the ship docked on "Clauda" to try to repair the ship</div>
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*only time word is mentioned</div>
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No direct meaning but 2 derivatives</div>
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<li style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Claudico-to limp or to be lame; to halt; waver; be wanting; incomplete or defective (specifically relating to physical infirmity that makes a person limp or lame all together)</li>
<li style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Claudo-to limp; to shut something that was open; to close</li>
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How many have reached those islands in life</div>
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*situations, relationships, jobs, education </div>
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Get to these places for a way or escape or opportunity to start something new and meet nothing but carnage and blockage</div>
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*we see the door closing</div>
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*hot stove</div>
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*falling off of horses or bikes and water problems</div>
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Relationship with Bedford I tried to work out</div>
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*failed repeatedly</div>
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*hit the altar to find out why (we love each other, what's the issue)</div>
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*"it's simply not time yet"</div>
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*try to force things to happen when it's simply not time</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
People tried to make rafts to get off the island</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*where were they gonna survive to go in that kinda storm on a raft</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Verse 23: back to the water and purged everything that provided their own provision</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*left with nothing (no food, clothes, etc)</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-Paul tells them about the angel of the Lord reassuring that all will be well</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
History has already shown what's gonna happen to me</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*nothing tangible to rely on</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*broken ship, middle of nowhere, storm</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*no food or will to live</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
I'm bout to die!</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
The Lord had them right where He needed them</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*you hear what's being said, but it makes you angry because all you can see it water and a ship that's barely holdin on</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*mu situation shows I'm gonna die and God is saying "Trust me"</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
The kids and moving in together example </div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
He knew that land was just a little ways away</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*fishers who toiled all night-other side</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*men that dig the holes that the enemy took over-dig again</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*job you applied for a few times and you were denied</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*back to school-didn't do so hot</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Some of those "failures" were God just saying "it's not time just yet"</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Being released into a new dispensation of time</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*you feel it in your spirit</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*that failure is fighting your decision to move</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Are you gonna trust the defeats of your history, or are you gonna listen to what the spirit of God is welling up inside</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Are you gonna let history shut up your giftings?</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*your gift will make room for you</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-but when the room is made, will you occupy the space or will you let someone else do the thing you were called to do</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
OUCH LORD!</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
The Lord is showing us the change of dispensation by the things we're experiencing now</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*ease of frustrated petitions. </div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-lunch, OT, cars, health, beauty</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
We want signs and wonders in this big grand fashion, because we think that's the only way to prove that it's God</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*ignoring the small victories </div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-migraine study</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Those "small" heart/soul cry answers are showing so much more than the grand gestures</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*things you didn't tell anybody about, but it's done</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
God wants to heal you EVERYWHERE you hurt</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*not just the areas that other people can see</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-those are the easy things to give</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*inner battles are what we shelter because of that history</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-He wants those even more</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
The man of God also talked about people being blessed on the way to your blessing</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*can you accept it when it comes</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*does God have to strip you first before you can let history go and be able to receive</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
History says "it's been this long, it must be a no"</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*history says they ain't bout nothin</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
All the whole, your spirit it tugging on you like Tyson when he has to pee</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*incessant</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*dire importance that you pay attention</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
God is tugging, trying to tell you that it's time in some areas of your life</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*accept (and announce) the call</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*start school</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*take the job</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Don't let your past drown out the success in your future</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Last thing</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*catalyst for whole lesson</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*28:1</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*been so stuck on 27, that we forget there's a 28</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Everybody survived ad made it to the shore of an island</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Name of island is "Melita" (KJV) or "Malta" (NIV, Message)</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*means "Affording honey"</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Surviving the storm was only part of the story</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*staying together</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
-any deviation would have killed them all</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
*New beginnings was a land that assured blessings and miracles</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Barbarians showed "unusual kindness" to them everywhere they went</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Had to be transfigured before we could experience our new beginning</div>
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal; min-height: 14px;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
Welcome to Your New Beginning</div>
MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-72331280774423229662016-12-07T18:48:00.000-08:002016-12-07T18:48:33.046-08:00Day One<div style="color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 12px; line-height: normal;">
They finally opened the doors and let me out. When they opened, I swear it was like the weirdest feeling in the world. I was almost afraid to walk out. But now that I’m standing here, with the rays of the sun on my face, I think I’m ok. Man, the sunlight feels so off on my face. I’m been locked up for so many years, man. I only got to see the outside from the inside of those walls. Not able to feel the rays and the warmth on my skin. It’s almost like I can feel each ray on my skin. My skin is tingling from the heat. My face and my arms, all feel something so amazing. Every tingle and piece of warmth, is reminding me of how this freedom feels. For years I walked back and forth in that room. For years I talked to the walls and sat with my own thoughts and fears and emotions. For years, I tried to figure out and escape plan, not sure how if I was even bold enough to try to do it. I sat in that room for so long that I the days, months, and years blended together. I had no idea how long I was in there. I slept during the day and I slept during the night. Who knows for how long. So now that I’m standing on the outside, I don’t know how i feel. One on end, I’m feeling every element of my freedom But at the same time, I’m feeling like a legitimate career inmate…I’ve been in for so long, that I don’t know anything other than that confinement. I have to learn how to be free for the first time in my life. I have to learn how to live as a person instead of an inmate. I have to learn how to interact with people. People that looked like the warden. People that remind me of the warden. I have to be able to look at them and not immediately get defensive. I have to look at them and deal with them like an adult, and not a scared or angry little girl. Freedom is amazing and scary. I need new skills, new conversation, a new life. Everything about me has to be different from this point forward. How do I do this thing? </div>
MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-81273354822302533132015-11-24T15:20:00.004-08:002015-11-24T15:20:46.237-08:00I Let Me Down (Written in 2009)<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It is often said that everyone plays the fool a
time or two in life, but what if you are always playing the fool. It seems like
everyday is spent as the outsider and dummy of the group. “Why am I the one
always getting hurt?”, “What is it about me that attract people that I allow to
hurt me?” “Why do I fall for it every time?” These are questions that are often
asked in that type of situation. And it’s all because of the one emotion that
plagues mankind more so than any infectious disease: love.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It seems so simple in the storybooks-boy meets
girl, girl meets boy, and they fall in love and live happily ever after. That
is how it’s supposed, or so I thought. If I would have known then what I knew
now, I think I would have saved myself a lot of heartache.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">You don’t want much out of it, just some
reciprocity, but I guess even to some people that seems to be too much to ask.
And in your mind, you know the reality of how the story ends, but your heart is
another story. It longs for the storybook ending at every available
opportunity. No matter what the logics of the mind say. That is how a
heartbreak occurs. When one person is stuck on a thing and they are determined
to prove other people wrong and at times prove themselves wrong and then they
are let down by the very thing that they are fighting for.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">As an adult, you wish on a star for that one
thing that you think would satisfy you in life; even though you think in your
head “<i>Yeah right, like a star can grant me that!” </i>But somewhere deep in
the crevices of your soul, you think “maybe this time, it just might work,
maybe this time it will be different.” Other than that you wouldn’t have tried
to wish it. And whether you care to admit it openly, you can’t help but to be a
little disappointed when it doesn’t happen.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">That is how children stop believing in Santa
Claus for Christmas. They ask for one simple (to them that is) thing every
year. And they get everything else that they ask for but that one thing. That
one thing that would make it the best Christmas ever to them. The sting of
disappointment every year is enough to make them stop believing in the magic
that the holiday season is supposed to bring.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">That is how I feel now. I’m not hurt, but I am
disappointed. More so at myself than anything or anyone else. I knew better in
my head but I allowed emotions to take over and get the best of me. And now,
once again, I’m the one with the gaping hole in the middle of my chest that
used to be filled with something that I thought was the greatest thing on this
natural earth. No matter how or why it ends, it always ends. And I’m the puppy
that is left going home to lick her wounds after the fight that should have
never been.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The world of hip hop has let me down again.
Hopefully for the last time. I need to take a break from it all and I’m not
sure if I’ll be able to return to it the way that I used to. It has become the
very thing that it has tried to hard to protest against musically. It has sold
out to the main stream and didn’t even realize it. And I was so busy listening
and thinking of my own songs that I’m ashamed to say that I didn’t realize it
either. Until now that is. My eyes have been opened and now I see the truth. I
have been forced into the realization that Slick Rick and Doug E. Fresh are no
longer in the game. They have been replaced with watered downed renditions of
emcees. And I am left with that and not by choice.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">My love for hip hop has been tainted. A love
that was once so pure and innocent is now slowly becoming non-existent. Which
is not necessarily a bad thing I’m coming to realize.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">What once was, is no more.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-15971648896706562552015-11-24T15:17:00.002-08:002015-11-24T15:18:46.378-08:00Drummer One (written back in 2010)<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Over
the years, I have tried to get over it but time and time again, I find myself
back where I started. Listening for the rim shots of my Drummer One. With every
lick of the sticks and kick of the bass comes floodgates of feeling and
emotions that I try so hard to convince myself aren’t there. Feeling that I try
to forget. We’ve played this song below. More times than I care to admit.
Repeating the same rolls and breaks every time. But every time I’m like a child
that watches the same movie over and over again. I know how the song ends but
yet and still every time I hear the intro, I’m glued to it, anticipating the
surprise ending that never comes. So I am posing a question to myself. Why
don’t I turn off the radio? Why is it that I am still shocked about something
that I’ve heard before? I know it’s not the special edition with all of the
added and deleted scene footage, and the alternate ending. I keep hearing the
same song over and over again. Every phrase is the same, every hook, and every
vamp. The only difference is the performance. Because it is live, there are a
few different variations from time to time. There are some new rolls and
possibly some that I will never hear again for whatever reason. But as I said
before, the skeleton of the song is the same. It is a track, so it never lets
me down. With it being on a board, the timing of the song can be alternated. It
can short, it can be long, and it’s all up to Drummer One. It is set up to
adjust to the mood of Drummer. He can play it in regular time or in half steps.
The bass line is always consistent. One thing any drummer is taught is to stay
in the pocket, no matter what else you do stay in the pocket. So that’s what he
does. His style varies; by he always remains in the pocket. And unfortunately
for me, he makes it every time. He doesn’t miss a beat. And neither do I. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<o:p>Rest in Peace My Drummer... </o:p></div>
MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-6032447816358139232015-05-14T13:11:00.003-07:002015-05-14T13:13:34.345-07:00Is Your Yes Sure (First Bible Study Lesson Notes)<div style="margin-right: 6px;">
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 24px;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I promise you, It’s just like your mind to mess with you when you're given an assignment. And the enemy just sits back and watches you destroy your own self. Enjoying that you’re doing all of his work for him. Less work of him to do.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">When the man of God gave me this assignment, I promise it felt like my insides were caving in on me. My heart hit my toes and tears formed in the corner of my eyes. And every thought was why I felt like I couldn't do this. I said to myself (and God) “In all the years that I’ve been around, this was the place that was only held by my leader and the ministerial staff, who am i to stand here in this position”. I looked at my life’s choices and where I feel like I am in my walk with God and said “surely, I’m not worthy. What in the world am I going to bring to EVERYBODY. I’m the least of them all”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">Then He said to me “none of them has lived a perfect life either. None of them haven’t lived without mistakes or decisions that they weren't proud of. None of them are without fault, so why should you be any different."</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">We so often say that “Lord you can use me. Use all of me” but that one phrase is so loaded and misused. We honestly don’t know just how much we’ll give and allow to be used until we get to a place where we have to give more than what we bargained for. I was (and still am) perfectly content with being where I was. In an effort to "stay out of the way” and stay "under the radar”. I enjoyed staying in that corner behind that there camera. It allowed me the comfort and peace of knowing that I wasn't being charged like those on the other end of my flash. I was held to a standard, but not as high as those on the other side.</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>Isaiah 29:13</b></span></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>(KJV) Wherefore the Lord said, Forasmuch as this people draw near me with their mouth, and with their lips do honour me, but have removed their heart far from me, and their fear toward me is taught by the precept of men:</b></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></em></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">On Sunday we talked about the women in the lineage of Christ and how all of those women had a couple things in common. The biggest one was shame</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Shame-<i>a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Synonyms for Humiliation</span></div>
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<table class="mceItemTable" style="border-collapse: collapse; border-spacing: 0px; margin-bottom: 1em;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="border: 1px solid rgb(0, 0, 0); margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></td><td style="border: 1px solid rgb(0, 0, 0); margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>embarrassment, mortification, shame, indignity, ignominy, </b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>disgrace, </b></span><b style="color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 24px;">discomfiture, dishonor, degradation, discredit, </b><br />
<b style="color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 24px;">belittlement, </b><b style="color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 24px;">opprobrium; loss of face; </b><br />
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<em><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b><br /></b></span></em></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b><em>informal </em>blow to one's pride/ego, slap in the face, </b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>kick in the teeth, comedown</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">The man of God talked about shame and how with our own shame and our own secrets that we carry, it cripples us from stepping out. I remember when I was pregnant (both times) and I used to literally pray and cry to the Lord “why me????” “Why do I have to be the one pregnant. I’m the youngest adult, we've only been here so many years, I moved here with my CHURCH, I’m not married, and yet, I’m the one with the baby”. I didn't get an answer the first go round. And then the second time, my petition got worse. I literally cried saying “Lord, WHY ME?!” and then one day, just as clear as I’m standing here speaking, I heard Him say to me “why not you?”. So even now, as we’re entering this different phase of ministry, the Lord is still saying “why not you? You say that I can use you...Why are you limiting me through your own hands?”</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>Isaiah 29:13</b></span></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>(NET) The Sovereign master says “These people say that they are loyal to me; they say wonderful things about me, but they are not really loyal to me. Their worship consists of nothing but man-made ritual”</b></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>(MSG) (verses 13 and 14)</b></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">“These people make a big show of saying the right thing,</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;"> but their hearts aren't in it.</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">Because they act like they’re worshiping me</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;"> but don’t mean it,</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">I’m going to step in and shock them awake,</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;"> astonish them, stand them on their ears.</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">The wise ones who had it all figured out</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;"> will be exposed as fools.</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">The smart people who thought they knew everything</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;"> will turn out to know nothing.”</span></span></b></span></em></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">We’re a people that likes to say that we know what God wants us to do with us and because of that, we’ll give our all. We’re so quick to say “Lord if you send me, I’ll go”. But is your yes sure? Is your yes truly from your heart, or is it just with your lips or your mind and understanding of what you think He has for you to do? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">When the Lord gives you a task that steps your out of your comfort zone, I firmly believe that it’s at that moment that He is seeing what’s really in your heart. The way you respond and the way that you execute the task is what your heart truly believes. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-right: 6px;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">The one thing that we try to keep to ourselves and cover up and conceal, can God use that very thing to speak life to someone else? Their shame was their ministry. Can He really use your womb, can He use your voice, can He use your broken decisions, Can He use your shame? Or is it too much of an embarrassment to allow God to use? </span></span><em><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">That struggle doesn't fit the life that I’m portraying now, so people are going to look at me differently…I don’t have that issue anymore, and I don’t want people took treat me like I’m still that way. </span></span></em><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">God wants to know if He can use that too. Or is your pride too strong to let it be used? </span></span></span></div>
<div style="color: #333333; line-height: 24px; margin-right: 6px;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #333333; line-height: 24px; margin-right: 6px;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>Psalm 4:2</b></span></em></div>
<div style="color: #333333; line-height: 24px; margin-right: 6px;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>O ye sons of men, how long <span id="yui-gen43">will ye turn</span> my glory into shame? how long will ye love vanity, <span id="yui-gen44">and</span> seek after leasing? Selah.</b></span></em></div>
<div style="color: #333333; line-height: 24px; margin-right: 6px;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-right: 6px;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">I’m not saying to go and profess to the rooftops all of your dirty laundry and say “now that I've confessed my all, you can come to Jesus now!” I’m not saying to divulge it all. The Word says in Proverbs that “a fool uttereth all his mind…”. But God is saying “can I use it if I see fit for it. Will you allow it to be a part of your all too"</span></span></span></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
</div>
MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-23950695417855236912014-10-11T13:52:00.001-07:002014-10-11T13:53:28.758-07:00PUSH<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<p align="center"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">Lord I need you to come in. I felt it begin, and then it was gone. It’s easy and then it’s hard. It flows, and then it’s backed up. I want to give what I want, but I know what I
heard You say to me, and I don’t want to, no I can’t negate that part. I’m trying too hard to be something that I
know in my spirit that I am, but I feel like I’m not. I believe in my heart that You are using me
for Your purpose, but my mind and my memories keep telling me that I’m not
worthy. I’ve been called powerful and an
encouraging, and I feel like I’m trying to force it out. Knowing that it’s never comes out that
way. I want it to be able to flow like
it used to. I want it to be able to be
second nature like it used to. I want to
be able to just step out and do and feel that comfort that I used to. But I need your help. I don’t want the extreme emotion to be the
driving force for me to be able to perform.
But it feels like that’s the only way it seems to happen. I want the fullness of ministry, instead of
the fullness of my emotions. I want my
belly to give life instead of stillborn. I want to look at my baby and love it.
Not feel intimidated by it. </span></p>
<p>“Just trust me daughter”, I hear a
subtle whisper in the wind say. “What you feel is the push of the end of the
struggle. The intimidation is simply the
understanding of the gravity of what you have inside of you. But what you have
yet to realize is that while you were going through those moments, I was giving
you what you needed for this moment here.
I’ve promised you balance and you haven’t even taken the time to see it
yet. When the job was lost, I supplied the need. When the baby got sick, I gave you
peace. When you felt like your heart was
shredded to pieces, I gave you strength.
When your experiences (that you felt were so out of my will) tore you
down, I gave you wisdom. And when you
felt like you couldn’t go any further, I gave you a boost. </p>
<p>Whether you realize it or not my
child, I’ve been there the entire time, shaping and molding your womb to bring
forth the life of your gift and your calling.
For this entire time, I’ve shaped you, grown you, and matured you for
this perfect moment.</p>
<p>But Lord, how do I get through this
thing? How do I get the balance that’s been promised to me? How do I know if
I’m even doing this the right way? <o:p></o:p></p>
<p> And He simply says PUSH</p>
<p>The time is now for you to release.
The time is now for you to bring forth.
The time is now for you to produce life…The struggles were only the
labor pains. No labor comes forth
without pains. Even nature teaches you
some things my love. The more intense
the pain and the closer together the pain comes, the closer you are to your
birthing. And I’ve been right there
holding your hand, coaching you and helping you breath. Now the time has come for you to buckle down
and push. I’ve been waiting on you. I
didn’t want to force you or allow you to force yourself before it’s time,
because this is important to my work.
There will be no miscarriages or still borns of this gift. You cannot abort this gift. It’s coming and
it’s coming now. Everything you’ve suffered
through has been for this moment. All of
the tears have been for this moment.</p>
<p> Now PUSH</p>
<p><o:p> </o:p></p>
<!--EndFragment-->MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-20861370797595341682013-08-30T11:54:00.000-07:002013-08-30T11:54:31.055-07:00Homework AssignmentThis was an actual assignment that I had for class. The assignment was to choose a photo (from a series of 5 that were provided) and write a story as to what happened leading up to the photo being taken, and what happened after. Any perspective that you want and in any tone you want. So, as I was writing, I had to inquire into some creative freedom. My professor basically said "go for it", so I did. Excuse the expletives. :) Also, there's no title. Sorry. LOL<br />
<br />
<br />
Here's the image that I chose<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnEd8hAccK3xJyIVrIr3nhbP5mEA2bLIG9ayVv8qHGuM6Tr7DZq4DU2ycMjPsrcHEdX75hEqlNaUrlVmFFJse0aMJVQcsphG5kG3Ddw9RsAXRokzOHPiFrMBH7jgmKsmhKNI8x4hUcU4M/s1600/Image.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnEd8hAccK3xJyIVrIr3nhbP5mEA2bLIG9ayVv8qHGuM6Tr7DZq4DU2ycMjPsrcHEdX75hEqlNaUrlVmFFJse0aMJVQcsphG5kG3Ddw9RsAXRokzOHPiFrMBH7jgmKsmhKNI8x4hUcU4M/s320/Image.png" width="240" /></a></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Here's my story:</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left; text-indent: 0px;">
<span style="text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">Every
day lately, it seems to be the same thing: day in and day out. Everybody wants
to make a name for themselves. But that they don’t understand is that while
their “making a point”, they’re taking me away from my family.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">My wife cooked my favorite dinner, but do I
get to eat it? No.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">Why? Cause I’m
standing here, looking at these punks that want to protest.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">I have to take away from tucking my kids in
because I have to work.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">“It’s all a part
of the job” they tell me.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;">Tell that to
my family.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“<i>Hey Johnson!</i>” One of the guys says to me
as we pull up to the building. I gave the most disgruntled “fuck off” waves
that I could muster back in his direction.
“<i>This should be a peaceful one
tonight they said</i>” he said to me as I was getting out of the car. “<i>I sure
hope so, I would like to sleep in my bed tonight</i>” I tell him as I pull out
my task force vest and shield. ‘<i>I’d so much rather be at home</i>’ I tell
myself<i>…well, here goes nothing</i>. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">We
all get in line, arm to arm and shield to shield. <i>Why
won’t these kids just go home??</i> I say as I brace myself for what is getting
ready to come next. <b>*snap*</b> a flash
goes off and it hurts my eyes. Somebody
just took a picture. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<b><i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“Ladies and Gentlemen! It’s time
for you all to go on home”</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> Chief says over a
bullhorn as he walks in front of us. It’s loud and in my ear, but I’m already
in defense mode. I look over the crowd
standing in front of me. There are at least 20 of them and 30 of us. The one on the ground yells back “<i>No justice, no peace. Tell your men to go
home. We’re not going anywhere until our voices are heard</i>”. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<b><i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">“Look,
I’m not going to say it again. You all need to go on home!”</span></i></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">
Chief said again “<b><i>We don’t want things to go left field and we can all have a good
night.”</i></b> Just then, something came flying through the air in our
direction. ‘<i>What the fuck is that’</i> I said to myself. Then more started coming. These
little ass holes had bags of dog shit and they were throwing them at us! Really?!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> “<b><i>Draw your weapons and protect yourself at
all costs!</i></b>” we heard yelled. We knew what that meant. Shields drawn and
gear in place. It was time for battle and we were in an all-out attack with
some damn kids. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">No
sooner than I got over what happened, they started running towards us with bats
and who knows whatever else. We’re using the shields and gear to protect
ourselves from this chaos, trying to not really hurt anybody but not get hurt. And all the while, this little shit is still
sitting on the ground in that same damn spot not saying a word. I want to pull my gun out and scare the
living daylights out of him. Everything
about him is smug. From the sinister
grin on his face to the way he’s sitting here watching these people put
themselves in jail or worse. He doesn’t
care anything about these people. He’s
out here for something else…something doesn’t quite sit well with me about
him. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Just
then, my suspicions were right…the little shit stood up and pulled off his
hoodie. Strapped to his chest was pound after pound of explosives. “<b><i>NO JUSTICE! NO PEACE! Meet me in hell mother
fuckers!</i></b>” “<b><i>BOOOOOOMB!!!”</i></b> Everybody (officers and protestors alike)
screamed. They had no idea…They really had no idea! All of the fighting ceased
and we took off after him. But before anyone could get to him, he did it. I
covered my face with my shield and <b>BOOM!</b>
There was blood, charred flesh and limbs everywhere. Blood ran down my shield
from somebody, I don’t even have an idea who’s.
The entire area was covered in smoke and his lifeless mass was on the
ground, right in the same damn place where he sat. I turned around to see who was alive behind
me. Just about everybody was gone:
chief, all of the protestors, camera crew from the news that came out,
reporters. (I didn’t even see them) It looks like the entire block was taken
out. Cars were on fire. It was nothing but a pure mess. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-align: justify; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 200%;">A
drip fell and hit my eyelashes…then another. <i>What is this? </i>I said to myself. I touched my face and saw that it
was blood. I immediately dropped my shield and felt my head. ‘<i>where was it</i>?’ I felt around and there
was a big gaping hole where my helmet was. All I felt was wet. The more I panicked, the more tired I became.
Soon I felt myself falling. I tried to steady myself, but it my arms didn’t work.
All the while, blood was dripping into my eyes.
I didn’t even feel myself hit the ground. The only thing I saw and felt
was the black abyss of death.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<br /></div>
MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-88807870701203124762013-08-21T18:46:00.001-07:002013-08-21T18:46:37.898-07:00Liberty<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="color: #535353;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I’m sitting here with my head back and my eyes
closed and I’m able to move across my keys just as fluidly as if I was looking
at the screen. With no particular thought in mind, but allowing my
fingers to do the thinking and allowing that creative freedom to roam. I
find it interesting that when I open my eyes and look at my keys and my screen
that the words don’t flow as easily as they do when my eyes are closed. I
wonder if it’s an unsaid fear at the sight of my own thoughts staring me in my
face on the screen, of just an unsaid but understood self-confidence
issue. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #535353;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I believe that I’m a good writer and
I love to watch or hear of the effect that my writing has on others. But the
freeing aspect of putting those thoughts into visual words has always been the
greatest fear of mine to overcome. My thoughts are provoking, and after
last week’s blog, just as powerful as my words. For they are the very
foundation of where those words emerge. And it’s because of that power,
that I’ve kept them hidden for years. Just now really emerging to let the words
fly free. Knowing that when they are read, that a portion of me has also been
revealed. </span></span><span style="color: #535353; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">It’s a journey that I’m willing to take so that I can be
just as free as those that read. Why allow them to be free by the very
thing that at one time bound me?</span></div>
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MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-91630707099507570192013-08-21T18:40:00.000-07:002013-08-21T18:40:20.734-07:00All Up To You
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1rMS_if6y6KQjYT4DVfzL4UjlRLFDF0Dff-bXxx6OutOqJfoeu64mHReSjVKSrRIxOoK5m_slKjU878qSlBXpxgH1AgV4o3G8tkoKAEeKnY1M-WaE1W2Uy_cvAyoHLBiQfsGazvHCA-g/s1600/thought_explosion_140965.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1rMS_if6y6KQjYT4DVfzL4UjlRLFDF0Dff-bXxx6OutOqJfoeu64mHReSjVKSrRIxOoK5m_slKjU878qSlBXpxgH1AgV4o3G8tkoKAEeKnY1M-WaE1W2Uy_cvAyoHLBiQfsGazvHCA-g/s320/thought_explosion_140965.jpg" width="263" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #535353;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The way you live your life is
according to what you speak. If you want to do well in life, speak that
wellness into it. Too often we think and speak negatively without the realization
that what we have is what we’ve spoken.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> </span><span style="color: #535353; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> "…The power of death and
life is in your tongue…” We take that statement so lightly and don’t
really think about how much weight our words hold. To us, they are just
words; not something that makes the determination for how we live our
life. I know, for me, I have experienced a lot in life and because of
that, I’ve trained myself to “keep myself to myself” all for the sake of what I
thought was protection. But what I’ve found is that I wasn’t protecting
myself, I was pushing everyone that cared about me away. All in an effort
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<span style="color: #535353;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Now that I’m in a position to alter
some things in my life, I don’t want to hinder what I can accomplish.
Attending Full Sail was a dream of mine from the time that I entered the
world of design. But telling myself that I wasn’t able to do, and that
there were too many reasons why I couldn’t do it. So when I made up in my
mind and said that I was going to do this, I had the momentum that I needed to
start and continue and finish. All because I took the initiative to
change my thought process and change what I was speaking on my life.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #535353; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">So today, I encourage you, the
reader, to change the way you think and the way you speak. For what you
say you will have, is what you will have.</span></div>
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<!--EndFragment-->MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-1069272409967695102013-08-12T15:33:00.000-07:002013-08-21T18:34:54.331-07:00Writer's Block<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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What do you do when the things that you are able to do, don't work out the way you want them to? The world of design relies and is completely hinged upon the ability to create. So what does a designer do when the creative doesn't come?<div>
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Right now, at this point in time, I'm in that place. Life issues have caused a creative dam that I'm having the hardest time to overcome at the moment. I have been blessed with a natural gift for the arts. Writing, music and design have been my three biggest areas of expression (hence the name "MuziqMami"). All of which hold a substantial weight in my passion; because they all show a different aspect of me. My mind thinks in images and colors instead of words and phrases. So those three parts of me allow that expression to flourish.</div>
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But as I'm sitting here with my fingers to the keys, my mind thinks of a far off land. One filled with those bright colors and images swirling around my head and across my eyes an ears. But they won't leave the world that they are in and convey themselves to my fingers so that I can relay them across the keys.</div>
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I desire to be able to let the creative consistently flow freely. But tonight it just won't come. Possibly tomorrow, when life things are back in order, I'll be able to express what's inside of me in a ways that's conducive to the art of expression that I so desire. Until then, I'll continue to type and allow what's in me to try to push itself forward.<br /><br /></div>
MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-25496702855871886972013-06-01T16:18:00.001-07:002013-06-01T16:18:52.691-07:00Letter of Apreciation<span style="font-family: MarkerFelt-Thin; font-size: 18px; line-height: 24px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.292969); -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0976563); -webkit-composition-frame-color: rgba(191, 107, 82, 0.496094); -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; ">Crying my heart out for a change. For the opportunity to be filled and to be free. In all of my years of prayer, I never prayed a prayer as earnest as I did this one. I said “Lord, they tell me that you have something for me to do and that I have a gift. So Lord if this thing is really true and You want this thing done, I know that the only way that I am going to live beyond these next few days to get this thing done is for you to send someone to save my life. I believe in Your Word and your love. But right now, all I feel is darkness and the closing in of the walls that I put around me. Help me God!”</span><div style="font-family: MarkerFelt-Thin; font-size: 18px; line-height: 24px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.296875); -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0976563); -webkit-composition-frame-color: rgba(191, 107, 82, 0.496094); -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; "><p><o:p></o:p></p><p>And in a subtle soft voice, the Lord reminded me of His word. He said “I will give you pastors according to mine heart, which shall feed you with knowledge and understanding”. "Be patient and trust me,” He said. “For I need you to be right where you are so you can know the fullness of MY restoration. “ </p><p><span style="line-height: 22px; ">When I joined this ministry and experienced the Lord for myself, I wanted different for my life from that day forward. My internal belief said that I was scarred for life, but my faith said that I was able to be whole. My faith made me want different. I desired to be something that I'd never knew existed. I wanted and needed to know who I was. Had it not been for faith and this ministry, I would have never taken the time to realize that. I would still be the hollowed out, hardened carcass of a person that I was.</span></p><p><span style="text-align: justify; ">When God places people in your life it’s often not known at that time the specific reason until a later time. I truly feel as though this is the time in my life that it was meant for. When you two were placed in my life I was in a place where I felt nothing but pain that I couldn’t explain nor understand. I just did everything in my power to try to hide it or pretend that it wasn’t there. But somehow, you unlocked the cry in my soul and not only tamed the beast that was within but also trained her to be not just a woman, but to be a lady, which was not an easy task. For you are still being challenged by my “intellect” and my desire to mask what is truly inside. I know I don’t make dealing with me easy. Although I am still working on me, I still have so much work that needs to be done. And I appreciate and commend you for not throwing me away, nor allowing me to throw myself away even when I tried. On more than one occasion. For the many roles you two have played in my life I thank you. For the many nights you were up praying for me I thank you. For the times you spent encouraging me when I was down and pushing me to do and be better, in spite of me, I thank you. For being who you are both inside and outside the church I love you. So on this your anniversary I want to commemorate and celebrate the leaders that God has allowed you to be to me. I love you and appreciate the time, the dedication, the correction and determination to not allow me to quit. Happy Anniversary</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; "><o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p><p> </p></div>MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-59434690876842537642012-12-12T05:33:00.001-08:002013-05-04T11:02:12.342-07:00Love UnconditionalVery seldom does one come across a love that transcends time. A love that makes every day of life worth living just that much more and yet causes a standstill every time it's voice is heard. I met this love once before; met it in the oddest of places. It wasn't that ordinary love: you know the one that last but eventually runs cold like the end of a bright candlestick. It was ironic love that was dreamed of as a little girl.<br />
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I remember thinking to myself, there's no way this can be genuine, but time has proven again and again, and is continuing to prove it to be just as genuine as I've imagined. The drawing power of this love has kept me coming back in a way that I can't describe. The metaphor of a moth to a flame has nothing on the pull that this love and I share. <br />
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Verbally never spoken, but the feeling very much understood. This love is something amazing. It consumes my thoughts, feelings, and emotions; right down to the very core of my being. It shatters any doubts or insecurities that I could ever have, for I know that if I have no other love in life, that this love that I now have, will always be a part of me.MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-71349894228166266702012-10-08T15:29:00.001-07:002012-10-08T15:29:14.476-07:00I miss...Your smile, your touch, your hugs, and your kiss...the look in your eye when you tell me I'm beautiful, and being the one your heart longs for. I miss your passion and your love. The way your fingers graze across the keys ever so lightly when your deep in thought. I miss the good morning text messages and the ones to say good night. How your nostrils flare when your thinking too hard or frustrated. I miss your drive and dedication. I miss fussing about how much you work but inwardly admiring your ethic. I miss sitting up at night on the phone or computer blushing at the way you smile. And waking up the next morning with the biggest smile at the mere thought of your name. I miss the butterflies in my stomach when I know you'll be near and the smile that creeps at the corner of my lips when I hear your name. I miss your strength and the authoritative way you speak. Your encouraging words and you making me go to sleep (lol). I miss the silly conversations that seem to never end, and feeling the nervous excitement like a teenager when your ringtone rings. I miss the talks of the future and all that it would bring. Looking back through the years thinking this man is the answer to my dreams. I miss glancing to my left and seeing you stare back at me. Making my cheeks blush because I know that just for a moment, I'm all that you see. <br />
MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-90786477485934336572012-03-12T17:56:00.000-07:002012-03-12T17:56:51.319-07:00You Win<span style="background-color: white; color: #c27ba0; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 13px;">You aren't close to me yet, but you've already invaded my personal space. The mere thought of you is with me. And it must be the vividness of my imagination that's playing tricks on me. Making me want you. The wind blows and I feel the caress of your lips on my neck. I can hear the memory of your voice whispering in my ear. How in the world is this possible? You aren't supposed to have this kind of effect on me...but then again I guess you are. Lord have mercy! What have you done to me sir. Time has brought us closer. No longer do I have the safety of the ocean separating us...your here, we're here, face to face, only minutes apart from one another. You've distracted me from my daily routine, but I love it. I love waking up and smiling at the thought of your thoughts of me. Giddy like a high school girl whose fallen in love for the first time. And yet having the yearning of a woman in need. As much as I shouldn't, I crave you. You've turned that emotional valve on full force and now I can't help myself. I called myself not letting myself go and keepin my cool, but you got me. You got me right where you want me. You win. LOL.</span>MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2315200438300017467.post-12135674486850277352012-02-28T20:32:00.001-08:002012-03-16T16:56:58.306-07:00Untitled part 2As time and space draw closer, my heart grows with anticipation at what the potential outcome will be. Will you take a bow and ask my hand, or will the past rear it's head long enough to deter. It's like I'm straddling a fence trying to decide which side to get down on, but the decision on which side to move isn't mine. I'm waiting on "him" to make his grand entrance back into my life and choose the next course. Never would have imagined to see this day again. I chalked it up to another lesson learned. One of those things that I just "don't talk about" because it still hurts too much. But to see things revolve again and return full circle has me nervous and excited at the same time. Time is the only true storyteller right now. So we shall see...MuziqMamihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12804741798343293656noreply@blogger.com0